Introducing myself...

I do admit...i have this feeling inside my stomach...you know,the one when you feel a bit nauseous from excitement or anticipation..it reminds me of so many other instances in my life but more so when i was younger...where the marks of disappointment hadn't yet been deeply enough marked onto myself and anything that was a new and fresh idea was just the same as inhaling a wonderful fresh breath of air...

Growing up though,you come to realize that the world isn't just a huge valley of dreams. This is another beauty that realization brings. My need to write has not changed over the years. It's still the same youthful idea that made me stay up at nights way back then, writing down thoughts and ideas, secretly in bed at night, under the blankets and then trying to find a secret place to hide this book of thoughts. I look back on the thought that I had back then. I wanted and yearned what I wrote to be read by tens, hundreds and maybe even thousands of people. It wasn't so much as to gain fame or economic success...at that age how many of us really did strive to achieve that? I certainly did not. What made the idea exciting is just the fact of sharing your ideas..your fears...your joys...your everything. Reminiscing all of that and the unfulfilled need and desire, still make my eyes shine with joy...this is a certain spark that will never burn out I'm sure...

The dream to be read by many has changed though. When my close friend introduced me to blog writing recently, I will not exaggerate by saying that i felt the same and even more so overwhelming feeling of excitement as I had all those other youthful years before. The only difference now is that instead of wanting to 'grasp' the world by its horns as we often say, I would now be more than satisfied if my thoughts were read by just only one set of eyes. I always believed that my inner need to transform feelings into words and sentences would only be satisfied if i had an audience to read these thoughts. Having them all locked and closed up in notebooks and hidden underneath clothes in drawers is not where I wanted to see my thoughts found.

This however seems to be the right place. I think that at last my dream has come true and that I have found the audience that I was always searching for...